36c3 1Komona

Book club for grown-up victims
2019-12-28, 12:30–13:30, nokingdome

I am proposing to share information, thoughts, likes, dislikes... about useful books for victims.

UPDATE: I created a pad to write down our notes : https://annuel2.framapad.org/p/9e4c-book-club-for-victims_htkn59clq2

This session is NOT a group therapy, it is NOT a substitute for therapy and I am NOT a psychologist (I work as an IT engineer actually, I am just a regular victim in late stage recovery and who grew up with an overentitled mother and suicidal father.)

Being a victim is a hard experience. Being raised as a victim within a dysfunctional family (or more generally sustaining long, repeated abuse/neglect with no possible escape) is even worse. Your mind gets conditioned to tolerate abusive behaviours from others, your intimate life seems like a perpetual Cornelian oscillation between isolation (to protect yourself) and toxic relationships (because you are a magnet for narcissist personalities). Recovery is a long journey with many digressions and set-backs.

This workshop is primarily intended to raise awareness, knowledge and resilience among victims. These are critical ingredients, because:

  • taking care of oneself is part of the recovery
  • good therapists are hard to find
  • even a even a good therapist can become a SPOF in your life
  • the pharmaceutical industry won't help (somatisation is good for business, you know)
  • traumas are diverse, reading about others can give perspective and reduce isolation

There are lots of self-help books (of varying relevance and quality) and the ecosystem is in steady movement, especially this year with the complex post-traumatic stress disorder (C-PTSD) being officially recognized by the World Health Organization (since the adoption of ICD-11). Naming problems helps to fight them.

All kinds of books are welcome, whether it is a self-help book, a scientific publication, a fiction or anything else. Also we may talk about other works of art (films,...) if you like.

Bring your favorite books with you (to share their content with the other attendees) and be supportive(*) to each other!

(*) I prefer avoiding the word 'excellent' here because I understand that its superlative nature can be over-interpreted by those of us who are codependent.